FIVE LOVE MYTHS

If you have been looking for meaningful relationship without much success, consciously and unconsciously you might base your relationships on some beliefs that could be stopping you from finding your true love,

Love myths are beliefs about love, romance and relationships. We developed these beliefs over the years from watching TV, movies or reading romantic novels or pick them up from people we grew up with and accept them as fact.  Consciously and unconsciously you might make your relationship decisions based on these 5 myths. Now let’s look at each of them

  1. True love conquers all

Thinking back to your past relationships, have you ever had the belief if you love each other, things will work out? All you need is love. So you expected no problems and no conflict. Happily ever after.  

The Consequence from this belief? You might avoid facing your relationship problems or tell yourself “if we love each other enough, they won’t matter

You might stay in unfulfilling relationships even when they are not working. You tell yourself: if I love him more, he will change

You might beat yourself up emotionally when a relationship doesn’t work. You keep telling yourself: if I had only love him more, I could have saved it

The truth is love is not enough to make a relationship work. It needs compatibility and commitment

2.If it is true love, you will know it the moment you meet him called love at first sight

Love at first sight is really lust at first sight. You infatuate with the image of your mate: the look, the profession, money they have, car they drive. So you build your fantasy in your head. You put a lot of emphasis on chemistry, avoid examining the rest of the relationship, qualities of your mate, compatibility, do you two share some values and have same life goals. You get addicted to flashy & exciting beginning, think relationship should be like that all the time. When problems occurs, you either panic or avoiding

The truth is it takes just a moment to experience infatuation. But true love takes time to reveal.

Remember: falling in love is the easy part. But building a healthy relationship takes work.

3. Fantasy of the one

You believe there is only one true love who is made for you and perfect for you. Once you find the one, life would be perfect.

It created scarcity. Over 7 billion people on the planet, roughly half of them are of the gender that you want to partner with, only 1 of them is perfect you and you got to find him

You compare your partner to your fantasy picture of the one and didn’t take time to get to know his uniqueness and characters.

The truth is it is possible to experience true love with more than one person. There are many potential partners you could be happy with.

Remember each true love serve us in a different way.

But it doesn’t mean you can be with anyone. Finding a partner you love and also are compatible with you is the formula for a healthy, lasting relationship.

4. The perfect partner will fulfill you completely in every way

If you walk into relationships expecting your partner to fulfill your every need. Then you set up yourself for disappointment or resentment,

A good relationship doesn’t mean your partner is fulfilling your every need. Certain needs you need to fulfill by yourself. If you feel emotionally empty before you start a relationship, you will feel just as empty once you are in a relationship

The truth is a right partner will fulfill many of your needs but not all of them.

5. When you have wonderful sexual chemistry with someone, it must be love

Have you ever been in a relationship where only time you go along really well was in bed? However you still believed that was love?

If you believe in this myth, you might get involved with people you are not compatible with or you might stay in relationship longer than you should, and have hard time letting go of partners who are not right for you.

A great sex with a partner doesn’t mean you love them or they love you, doesn’t mean you are meant to be together or guarantee you have a good relationship. Only mean you have good sexual chemistry that can be the basis for a healthy relationship if you are compatible in other areas outside the bedroom.

Here are 5 myths that are stopping you to find true love. Remember it’s not the luck to make relationships work. Its wisdom, communication and two people’s willingness to work together to create an intimate and fulfilling relationship.

Every person situation is different. If you feel your situation is more unique and want to talk about, Please follow CLICK HERE to schedule a discovery session with me. It’s complimentary. Together we design a love map to find the love you deserve.

About Xiaoli Mei

Xiaoli Mei is a certified Relationship Coach, known as the Happiness In Love Coach for coaching professional women to find true love and to bring balance to a happy relationship with a busy career.
Having been on a quest to live the life of her dreams and share it with her beloved, Xiaoli emigrated to the United States from China in the late 90’s. She successfully established a career in Corporate America working for Fortune 100 companies. However, in spite of her great career, Xiaoli found herself feeling miserable, empty, lonely, confused and sad. Having experienced two failed marriages and other broken relationships, she knew there had to be a way to balance a successful career AND to have a fulfilling relationship.
Undeterred from her past experiences, Xiaoli set out to crack the “Happiness Code” while working two jobs and raising her 2 children as a single mom in San Francisco Bay Area.  She discovered what it takes for career women to find lasting happiness and love in today’s fast paced modern world.
Today Xiaoli lives happily with her soulmate Jim and teaches women from all cultural backgrounds on finding their true love. She guides her clients to bring balance to career and love, and helps them attain joy and harmony in their lives without sacrificing one important life aspiration over another.  Xiaoli is loved by her clients. Her coaching style is witty, wise, and highly empowering. She is an inspirational speaker and a natural motivator.

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